Couples Counselling
Relationships that matter most to us are where we are most challenged, and most able to grow.
All couples get stuck. When the same arguments replay without resolution, or distance quietly grows between you, it can be hard to remember what brought you together. This work is not about blame. It's about understanding the cycle between you, and finding your way towards more honest conversations.
“We live in the shelter of each other”
— Irish Proverb
What I work with
Couples counselling can help whether you're:
Having the same argument without resolution
Repeated patterns that leave you both feeling hurt
Feeling like roommates more than partners
Trying to rebuild trust after it's been broken
Navigating transitions and challenges; including consciously uncoupling and co-parenting
Different relationship styles, including non-monogamous relationships
Wanting to strengthen a relationship that's already good
Wanting to build deeper commitment and connection
What to expect
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Our first session is about getting a real sense of your relationship as it stands: the patterns, the pain points, and the strengths you already have. We'll also start shaping a picture of what you're each hoping for, and where you want the relationship to go.
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I then meet with both of you separately. This allows me to get to know a bit about your story, life experiences and how your relationship history might be influencing your current relational dynamics.
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We all meet together and discuss what I’ve noticed so far, and the way we want to move forward to support your goals.
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Regular couples sessions (either 50 or 80 minutes), meeting at a frequency that builds momentum while staying sustainable and consistent.
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Reviewing what's shifting between you and adjusting the pace as things improve.
How I Work With Couples
In couples work, the relationship is the client. The goal is to help you understand the patterns that have formed between you and what each partner brings to the dynamic. I am trained in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), and draw flexibly on several frameworks:
Emotionally Focused Therapy: mapping the negative cycle you get stuck in, and the attachment needs and fears driving it
The Gottman Method: practical tools for managing conflict and rebuilding friendship, grounded in decades of research
PACT: how your earliest bonds shape what you each need now, and what happens in your nervous systems when things get heated
Together, we build skills for repair after rupture, and create rituals of connection and a shared vision for your future.
